


Hero in

by outer_space



Category: EXO (Band)
Genre: Angst and Romance, Drug Use, Light Angst, M/M, Mommy Issues, Stalker, Writer Do Kyungsoo | D.O, broken relationships, commitment issues
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-12-27
Updated: 2019-12-27
Packaged: 2021-02-25 22:47:14
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 7,792
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21993169
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/outer_space/pseuds/outer_space
Summary: Little did he know, a mysterious man watches him every night, the same man he broke his heart months ago.
Relationships: Byun Baekhyun/Do Kyungsoo | D.O, Do Kyungsoo | D.O/Kim Jongin | Kai, Kim Junmyeon | Suho/Oh Sehun
Comments: 4
Kudos: 14
Collections: Kaisoo OLAO Chapter Two





	Hero in

**Author's Note:**

> \- I hope for everyone to enjoy this work even if it's a bit rushed because I went through hell to write it. (It was one hell of a year, right?)  
> \- I want to thank the very lovely 'Berry' for her help with editing the first half of this work (I couldn't send the second half for I had no time. I hope there are few mistakes)  
> \- I actually wanted to kill someone at the end of the work(fatal love) but where's my Christmas spirit, right? ;)  
> -Also no smut ahead( slightly) it's implied.  
> \- I'm one month away from my midterm exams (I'm a senior TT) please wish me the best of luck.  
> \- enjoy, loves.

-December 1st, 2019

A knock on the door, in the late hours of the night, disturbed him. He got up and slackly reached the door to find that no one was there. 'What a disturbance!' he thought, but what was more disturbing was that there was no one and a plate on the floor, with a rice-cake in it; an indication that someone new had moved around here. But wasn't it rude not to show yourself and leave the plate on the floor like this? Wasn't the reason of giving your neighbors rice-cakes to introduce yourself? He took a mental note to give that rude neighbor a moral lecture about respecting others, if he ever recognized them.

Baekhyun, his boyfriend of a couple of weeks ago, came out of the kitchen area with two glasses of wine. He smiled at Kyungsoo as he approached him and gave him, a peck on the lips. He saw Kyungsoo's clasped fingers and eyes staring daggers at the dish in front of him. He nonchalantly grabbed the plate and had a bite of the cake.  
"Hey. No, no, don't," Kyungsoo said but his warnings weren't enough to stop Baekhyun. "It could be–" Kyungsoo imagined headlines to be 'Young Writer and Boyfriend Found Dead in Their Apartment in Seoul Due to Poisoning'.  
Baekhyun cut him midsentence and reminded him not to be paranoid. Kyungsoo snorted and took a bite himself. The taste was as good as bakeries' pastries. So he knew it was not handmade...

He, sometimes, wondered if he was a big, huge asshole for quickly finding someone new after his last relationship ended, that was about two months ago. Kyungsoo hated himself but he hated Jongin, even more, for leaving without notice, when everything was just perfect. 

Baekhyun was a new waiter at his favorite coffee shop and he was extremely nice to Kyungsoo, always expressing how much he respected him for being a writer, and that he, himself, liked reading. Kyungsoo knew the waiter was flirting, or, to be more specific, hitting on him. It wasn't easy for Baekhyun to see the sadness and gloominess radiate out of his new favorite writer, so one day, when he came to the coffee shop, after a while of not showing up, Kyungsoo decided he needed someone to fill out the space left by Jongin. That's how did Baekhyun end up in Jongin's place.

Apparently, two years of Jongin were more than enough for him to occupy Kyungsoo’s mind and heart, because Jongin was so damn perfect in every way imaginable, that you couldn’t just let the memories or feelings for him vanish so easily. He knew how to listen and what to say. He knew how to appreciate silence and how to fill it with hums of melody. He enjoyed watching the stars. His aura was comforting. He fit just perfect in Kyungsoo's world. Jongin inspired him. He set fires in his soul.

He was lost before he met Jongin. He gave Kyungsoo's life a meaning and put him back on track. Despite the fact that Jongin always needed to be wanted, and was sick to the bones, Because come on, this brat was perfect and had it all, yet he was so demanding and spoiled. He might have been his illness or cure, but with him gone, Kyungsoo’s life was empty. There was a hole in his heart, so big that nothing in the world could fill it, but the spoiled, smart, beautiful, rule-breaker, fucking Jongin himself.

-October 8th, 2017

It was a lovely day, the day he met Jongin; but a bit too chilly. Kyungsoo was in a good mood. The ballet show was mesmerizing. The dancers were amazing. He thought he should thank Junmyun sometime for inviting him, because now his eyes might have been opened to a whole new world. Our man had no idea he would have liked ballet this much. He decided he was going to attend more shows from now on. 'Damn,' he thought. Dancers made ballet look so easy with their talent.

Junmyun and Kyungsoo waited for Sehun, Junmyun's friend, to congratulate him for a successful show and to grab something to eat together after the show. Sehun came after a while with someone who was gaunt and tall. His skin was sun-kissed. Black hair. Features were lovely and his presence was comforting.

Kyungsoo wasn't comfortable in social situations and his career as a writer helped to avoid office interactions, meetings, and weekend gatherings. He would just write a book, send it to his respective publisher, then it's published and that was it. He was a peaceful human being, a little bit awkward when meeting new people. But not around this one. Jongin 'Sehun’s friend' was so friendly and easy-going. He would ask questions to keep the conversation going, he would look you in the eyes as you answer and actually show some interest in Kyungsoo being a writer.

Sehun and Junmyun got lost in an argument in the middle of this gathering. Kyungsoo didn't even bother to care what Junmyun thought about men performing ballet, he only cared about how this interesting cutie-face liked his coffee, and the way he explained ballet moves with his fingers, because he knew Kyungsoo won't understand what a fouetté turn was .  
He liked Jongin and wanted to stay, but he had to take a call and leave first. Jongin seemed startled when he was about to leave and Kyungsoo's anxiety got dropped to zero levels, noticing the other's interest in him. He kept repeating the dialogue in his head, on his way to meet his publisher, cursing himself for not asking for the other's number and wondering if he could have asked for it? Even if they sat together for only fifteen minutes before he left. He didn't know if he can see Jongin again.. he would love to meet him again. 

"I think it's amazing being a writer. It means you are one with your thoughts.. you write them down and create worlds that didn't exist. I would love to read a book of yours to know what do you think and what type of person are you," Jongin said.

"I would be honored to have you read one of my books, even if I'm not sure you'll find any of my thoughts in it… They are just fantasies and illusions of a perfect world and easy life." 

"So, you are telling me they aren't coming from your heart?_ you're doing it for financial benefits?"

"Actually, no.. yes_ I mean.."

"Oh, but_ will you ever write a story with you in it; from the content of your heart... one day?" he asked with a cute tilt of his head. 

"Who knows? Maybe I will!"

" I wonder. what is your zodiac sign?"

"I'm a Capricorn."

"OMG, me too_ Our birthdays must be close."

"I'm January 12th "

"January 14th," he said enthusiastically. "I didn’t think it was this close_ wow! "

"I didn't think you were a zodiac-signs type of person," Kyungsoo chuckled.

"I'm not," he laughed. "But you see how we ended up knowing that our birthdays were so close."

-November 7th, 2017-

They met for the second time in Kyungsoo’s favorite coffee shop. Where he liked to sit in front of his laptop to edit, and scrabble some story ideas and character traits. Jongin approached his table to say 'Hi' with his bangs covering his starry cute eyes. The man was eye-catching, with his lean figure and bronze skin, and to be honest, his pants were a bit too tight, and Kyungsoo didn't know why did that capture his attention, because wasn’t he straight after all? And it was not like Jongin resembled a woman or anything, he was quite manly, but something about him took Kyungsoo, he created an invisible string between his heart and Jongin's whole existence, just like a magical spell casted on the poor fellow minding his own business.

Kyungsoo stood up and offered his hand for a handshake in which the other accepted cheerfully. There was someone with him but he excused himself to leave after being introduced. "My teammate, Taemin. Taemin, this is Do Kyungsoo, the writer I told you I met a while ago,"  
"Hello, Mr. Do. It's a pleasure meeting you. Jongin told me a lot about you," Taemin said and politely bowed.  
"it's a pleasure meeting you too, Taemin"  
"actually, we were having a boys' day-out and we dropped by to buy some snacks," Jongin explained. "we would love to stay but you seem busy," Jongin noticed the big black- framed glasses Kyungsoo had on, the laptop, and the second half-full cup of coffee.  
"unfortunately, I am. I have to hand this by tomorrow. It's something that needed to be edited. Uhm_ we can meet sometime, I hope," Kyungsoo thought it was a good opportunity to ask for Jongin's number." but I don't know how to contact you," said Kyungsoo.

"You can give me your number and I'll call you." He fetched his phone. Kyungsoo pronounced the digits. Jongin pressed the digits as they were being spoken and instantly called so the other can save the number "We have a performance on the 5th of January, that is two months from now_" He rolled his eyes. "I really hope you would come." He smiled.

"Of course I'll come. I loved the show last time."

"You loved the show or the tight as fuck leggings." He winked. "I'll call you tonight to ask if you would grab some coffee with me when you hand in your draft tomorrow, I'm treating you," 

Kyungsoo laughed and shook his head "Ok. Sounds good !"

"Later then!"

"later,"

Kyungsoo opened his notebook and wrote under “character traits”.  
'Talkative, fun, smart extremely beautiful.'  
Under “notes” he wrote.  
'Nice to have someone who is interested in you.'

-January 5th, 2017

Kyungsoo was so frightened that day. It had been two months since they started seeing each other. They were in his apartment; Jongin was all dark eyes and tight pants. The way he curved in his stance as he poured a couple of wine glasses was seductive, even to Kyungsoo. He and Jongin sat on the fancy red sofa in Kyungsoo's living room. Shoulder to shoulder. Jongin brought the bottle of red wine. It was the sweetest third wheel and companion for a night like this. They wanted to celebrate after a successful show, and their two months anniversary. Their faces had a light tint of pink in them. Jongin was so close, he had his hand massaging Kyungsoo's thigh. The situation boiled in both of their tummies. They talked about this before... Jongin learned that Kyungsoo had never been with a man, and Kyungsoo learned that Jongin was the brave one, and he had done almost everything he desired in his life; regardless of what everyone thought of him.

In no time, Kyungsoo got his neck nibbled on by the other, licked by the other. Jongin went higher towards Kyungsoo's ears. Kyungsoo surrendered to the other's actions. Jongin was allowed in his private space, and he proved how qualified he was. He moved the kiss towards Kyungsoo's lips, and Kyungsoo didn't want it to be entitled as a casual kiss, so he deepened it. His lust for his partner urged him to. Jongin broke the connection to ask.  
"Do you want to touch me?" There was silence from Kyungsoo's behalf and Jongin was impatient. They both were captured and lustful. "Give me your hand." His demand was met with the gesture he requested. He took the hand and placed it just there. Kyungsoo flinched. The feeling wasn't new to his hand but weird because it was another man’s. Jongin excitedly bit his own lip and shut his eyes, then Kyungsoo's hand withdrew. "But do you want me to touch YOU?" Again there was no answer. Jongin understood that this type of relationship was new to his partner but he wanted to move forward, and show him what he had been missing. He placed himself on the floor, on his knees between Kyungsoo's thighs, his hands on each thigh, going up slowly till one hand reached its aim first, while the other hand stayed still. The hand gently massaged the clothed crotch. Kyungsoo seemed to enjoy it as his head relaxed and let himself groan.  
"look, I’m really flattered that I made you react!" They both chuckled. Kyungsoo pulled Jongin next to him just where he was sitting before, and demanded his lips once more. It was their first night together_ a night that lasted with love and pleasure. 

-December 2nd, 2019  
"Baekhyun, breakfast is ready" Kyungsoo called from the kitchen.  
"Come on, I know you're awake already," he yelled disheartened. A few minutes later he heard lazy footsteps approaching him, he didn't bother to turn around, too busy with what he was cooking. Suddenly, slender arms gently surrounded his waist.  
"I've put some more effort into making this for you." He felt the other's smile on his shoulder and a suppressed moan of 'Aw. "_ Hey, Jongin, can you please pass me a plate. Food is ready…" the loving warm person detached himself from the other with no response for a while. Kyungsoo turned around wondering where did Baekhyun go, only to find his angry eyes staring daggers into him.

"I'll no longer tolerate this... Last time you called me by his name, I said it's ok, you guys have just broken up... But no, I will not take this anymore. Apparently I have no place in your heart. Jongin has taken it all..."  
Kyungsoo just stood there, confused, as he watched Baekhyun rush into the bedroom. He followed him in an attempt to apologize, he wasn't ready to lose another lover. Furthermore, he wasn't ready to be alone again. 

He snatched the clothes he was about to wear out of his hands and tightly grabbed his shoulder in order to look into his eyes. Baekhyun was avoiding eye contact and anger was tinting his features.  
"I'm sorry. I'm so sorry, Baekhyun. It's my fault but please don't go. I want you in my life. I want to shout out your name, not his. I don't want to promise that I won't do it again. I want to show you, so please stay, okay, Baek?!" Baekhyun showed the most precious gesture by hugging Kyungsoo, and Kyungsoo hugged back as strong as his apology.

-December 2nd 2018

Kyungsoo woke up to this nice smell and an empty bed beside next to him. A rattle around the kitchen was heard. He crashed his head back on the below and his lips went up in an all-teeth, heart-shaped smile. Imagining his lover, who knew nothing about cooking, moving around the kitchen, trying to make something to eat. He eventually got up and went to see the struggle in person when he noticed the smell of burning. Jongin was cursing and grabbing his own head in disbelief.  
"Smells yummy!" Kyungsoo said sarcastically as he erased the look on Jongin's face with a peak on the lips. "Morning, cook."  
"Morning, love," he replied. "I was trying to make you something nice because you always cook for me, but I screwed up..." He poured some coffee for Kyungsoo and himself in mugs and sadly sat down.  
"We can still try it...!"  
"Are you sure?"  
"Yes," Kyungsoo said as he got up towards the burned toast and cheese in the pan. He poked the food with a spatula as he asked Jongin to hand him a plate. 

Jongin did just that, then he hugged Kyungsoo from behind. Kyungsoo turned around and handed the cook a plate of his making, took a bite of his own plate and released a moan of pleasure showing him that he liked what he tasted.  
"You're faking it. I know you are." He guided his finger towards the inside of Kyungsoo's mouth. "Spit it out at once..." Kyungsoo refused and swallowed. Jongin gave him another bite. It was willingly accepted, and Jongin shared that bite with his lover via a kiss. Despite the burned food, breakfast went on as lovely as their sweet laughter.

-December 1st 2019

It was actually a lie, Kyungsoo didn't keep the promise, he and Baekhyun went to the Han river where him and Jongin had their publically-dangerous memory. He gave Baekhyun a used memory; he bought his affection with an old memory in which he shared with Jongin. Like he had done so far, every gesture, every activity, every gift, everything but emotions. It was as if Baekhyun were there, to fill a gap on the red fancy sofa he shared with Jongin, on the bed where their cold feet touched and they giggled and snickered till they fell asleep, warm in each other's arms. Baekhyun found himself in Jongin's place, just to fill up the emptiness left by the one and only lover.

In the meantime, and after the departure of Jongin from his life, it was not as sweet as it used to be. He had always dreamed of having someone like Jongin in his life. It was merely luck, that what it was, having someone brave enough to do what you could never do, and express themselves in ways you could only express in your wildest dreams. Just like a hero. The two years of Jongin were an actual embodiment of that dream, like a wish gifted from a genie. But at that moment a piece of his soul was missing. He couldn't give Baekhyun the memory he gave to Jongin.

Hands clutched tightly into the mattress. Curtains closed and lights-off. Perspiration made it harder for him to fix his hands on his partner’s hips. Melodious moans started to get a tad bit louder. He could hear his name being uttered but it's not the same voice he was used to hear. He finished earlier than usual leaving his partner at haze, for he was cut off of pleasure in the middle of it. 

"Seriously?" Baekhyun asked showing his dislike.

"I'm sorry, love," he lied on the mattress and pulled Baekhyun into his arms and kissed his forehead. "I'm just tired."

"It's ok... I'll go finish in the bathroom," he tried to detach himself from the other’s arms, but the other refused to let go.

"Leave it to me," Kyungsoo gave a hand to his partner as they kissed softly; they both could taste the rice cake they ate before... Baekhyun finally finished but he turned himself the other way and Kyungsoo didn't even bother to spoon him as they both fell in deep slumber.

November 21st 2019

"How's Jongin?" Kyungsoo asked nervously. He wanted to hear how Jongin was doing, besides he thought it would be polite to ask about him considering that Jongin was a mutual fellow.

"I_ I actually lost contact with him," Taemin shrugged his shoulders apologetically and unknowingly. "I'm worried about him actually, and to be honest, I thought you knew something about him,"

Kyungsoo froze and his features faded. "No, I never heard from him since we broke up," he paused for a second then followed. "But w-why doesn’t he keep in touch with you? What is going on with him? He can't just disappear like this from people's lives!"

Taemin shrugged his shoulders again. Both Kyungsoo and Taemin finished their coffee in silence; after that Taemin excused himself to leave. 

Kyungsoo had never been this worried. A million thought came and went inside of his head. Jongin needed to be taken care of; he needed attention but instead, Kyungsoo just yelled at him when he found him sniffling that white powder. He said, he can't just try everything, at least not drugs. They fought about it, but Jongin was too high to be reasonable and Kyungsoo was too mad to listen as for why did Jongin start to do drugs. Kyungsoo lost his temper at Jongin and things cracked since then.

-October 9th 2019

That day, as he could recall, was the worst and best day of his life. They woke up in each other's arms, at noon after a long beautiful night of love, affection and appreciation. Kyungsoo got up first and headed to take a shower. He was humming delightfully. He finished but didn't turn the water off; instead, he got out to tell Jongin that the water was running and he should hurry and get up. He was surprised with what he have seen, Jongin was leaning on his arm, upper torso visible, while he sniffed on a powder that was aligned on the bed stand nearby.

"What the fuck are you doing?!" Kyungsoo exclaimed. "You're not taking that shit, are you?" 

"What does it seem like?" his laugh was creepy.

"Oh my god, Jongin! No fucking wonder why you’ve been off your fucking mind lately.. I don’t want to see you doing that again... Jeez!" he shouted and his hands got fisted.

"We'll see about that," Jongin let out a deep heartedly laugh. Jongin had never looked this creepy, it freaked the shit out of Kyungsoo. 

Kyungsoo walked over to him and grabbed the tiny bag with the white powder. "go take a shower and call me when this bullshit leaves your system" he picked up his clothes and put them on quickly. He peeked a look to see that Jongin was still in place, rather high. He couldn't believe what he saw. Jongin needed help. Later on that day Kyungsoo tried to contact Jongin, but he was not available, Kyungsoo didn't hear from his lover nor had he seen him since then.

-December 30th 2019

The phone rang, an unknown number. "Hello," Kyungsoo picked up. "Hello?" There was no response from the other side.  
"No response?" asked Baekhyun, who was sitting next to him, Kyungsoo shook his head.  
"Hello?" Kyungsoo urged for the last time "I'll hang up now.. .I'm at the movies so--"  
"You can't just say such things to strangers on the phone."  
The caller from the other side heard the few words Baekhyun said before Kyungsoo hung up.  
Kyungsoo was excited to watch this movie, while Baekhyun wasn't. The mere purpose of him being there was to spend some quality time with Kyungsoo and maybe play the romantic and lovey-dovey couple tangling their fingers and stealing glances at each other every now and then when the main couple of the movie or any secondary-couple kiss. Of course, it didn't go the way Baekhyun wanted it to go. Kyungsoo was so focused with the movie, while the other boy had no interest in it.

Kyungsoo's impression of Baekhyun was that he was someone with a heart as big as the universe. Kyungsoo had felt that their first date didn't go as Baekhyun expected. It wasn't that fun either. Kyungsoo was cold and silent most of the time. He had his hands tucked in the pockets of his coat as Baekhyun wrapped his arm around the other's. They have been meeting in Kyungsoo's apartment for awhile of time, so going out in a date for the first time, in the snow, gave Baekhyun a thrill that he was actually making a progress with Kyungsoo. That Kyungsoo was letting him in finally. Kyungsoo thought that Baekhyun was fixing him.. he wanted to be fixed, but his energy was sucked. Kyungsoo couldn't recall the last time he felt this way. Having his heart burnt. His mind at fuzz all the time. His seconds got stolen by thinking, expecting and waiting . .

' And, boy did he really love me?. Loving me was like playing with broken glass, you have to quit playing or anticipate hurting yourself anytime soon' he wrote under notes.  
"Home sweet home," Kyungsoo said  
"I'm making a cup of hot chocolate. I fell like having some. Do you want me to make you one as well?"  
"No, I'll have wine,"  
"Okay, wine it is,"  
Ten minutes later the taste of hot chocolate and wine got mixed perfectly in a passionate kiss. Kyungsoo's cheeks got tented in a light pink shade from the wine, while Baekhyun's because of butterflies in his stomach. They got interrupted by the ringing of Baekhyun's phone.  
"Sorry babe, it's my call to leave," he got up quickly, followed by the dark eyes of the other. "I told you I can't stay for tonight, I have to be home today, or my parents would disinherit me," he laughed. "or they won't let me celebrate the new year's eve with you" he finished putting on his combat boots. "Then we won't be able to spend it together." He showed a cute pouty face and Kyungsoo transformed it to a cute smiley face with a goodbye kiss.  
"Where is my key?"  
"Just knock and your parents will open."  
"No, I mean the key you gave me... I forgot it here before we left."  
"Let me check the bedroom..." Kyungsoo checked everywhere including the sitting room and the kitchen as well.  
"I'm pretty sure I left it on the key holder." He ruffled his hair in confusion.  
"I'll try harder to look for it. If I can’t find it, I'll make you a new one... Are you sure you brought it with you?  
"Don’t make me doubt myself, please!"

Kyungsoo was left alone. A few minutes after Baekhyun left he heard a knock on the door. He thought that Baekhyun had forgotten something and went back. He opened to see a shaking figure, a man wearing only black pants and a white shirt doing nothing to prevent him from the freezing cold outside, leaning on the door. It was Jongin whom he hadn’t seen in two months. Kyungsoo wanted to get it all out on him. All of the anger he suppressed for so long was about to burst at the other's face if Jongin didn't collapse right before Kyungsoo's eyes.

Kyungsoo freaked out. All the anger transformed into fear. He got down quickly to check on Jongin. His temperature was so high but his hands were freezing cold. Blue lips and red eyes. Dark circles and tired features. In a minute Jongin was laid down on Kyungsoo's fancy king-sized bed and a cold-water piece of cloth on his forehead and neck to reduce the temperature.

Kyungsoo finally sat down, on a chair next to the bed, after he made sure the temperature was going down. He just sat there staring at Jongin. He had mixed feelings, and a lot of questions, about what was happening. Should he be mad or terrified? 'Why the fuck did Jongin decide to show up now? Where had he been?' 

His thoughts were cut by a moan of pain that came out of the other. He seemed uncomfortable and started to rattle. Kyungsoo's heart ached to see the one he loved the most suffering, as there was nothing he could do. He was on his own. Kyungsoo didn't rest at all. He got himself busy in the middle of the night trying to make Jongin comfortable. He made him some soup. Who knew when was the last time he had anything to eat. Kyungsoo held Jongin in his arms and forced him to eat even if the other was showing resistance. When he made sure there was food in the other's stomach, he put the soup away. And hugged Jongin so tight because the other was shaking; he was unconscious, and his suffering was to begin.

Kyungsoo got up to the sound of his phone ringing. He picked up and Baekhyun's delightful voice cheered, "hey, babe. I hope I didn't wake you"  
"no, no, I'm still up,"  
"just calling to wish you a good night, I was about to go to sleep. I finished helping my parents for tomorrows party,"  
"Actually I suddenly have some ideas for the new book and I've been working on it since you left last night... And_ Um."  
Baekhyun seemed confused. "and?" asked in a cold tone. "what?"  
"About tomorrow night_ Uhm_ I got a call from the publishing house, they are holding a party and they need me to_ Come, because_ " kyungsoo's words couldn't help him form a lie properly.  
"Am I not accompanying you?" Baekhyun interrupted angrily. Kyungsoo ran out of excuses and seemed flustered. "Just say you don't want me, and stop wasting my time, Kyungsoo." Kyungsoo stuttered trying to make an excuse and to calm him down, but his attempts were not enough, nor honest to the other, so he hanged up.

Kyungsoo understood that Baekhyun was hurt by him, and there was nothing on earth that could soothe the pain he caused, but Kyungsoo wasn't Baekhyun's from the beginning. The broken glass Baekhyun was playing with finally cut his fingers and wounded his heart.

He went back to the room where Jongin was sleeping. His condition wasn't any better than when he came two hours ago. Kyungsoo brushed his hand over Jongin's hair to let him know he was there. Jongin fidgeted in place moaning painfully.  
"You have to get up. Let me give you a bath, then I'll see how well you've gotten." He smiled sadly at the other and aided him up to the bathroom, filled the bathtub with hot water and helped Jongin out of his clothes. In the meanwhile, Kyungsoo headed to the kitchen and brought two apples and two pears then sat next to Jongin, fruits were sliced and fed, one by one, to the man resting his arms on the bathtub edge.  
"Where have you been, Jongin?"  
"My mother passed away!" Jongin said recklessly but the piece of information shocked Kyungsoo.  
"Why the fuck don't I know about this? Why does no one know?" He threw the plate on the ground and it shattered. The other didn't even flinch. "I was supposed to be the first to know so I can be with you, but, no_ You decided you wanted to do drugs and disappear... You_ made me worry!"  
"And you decided to fuck Baekhyun, while I was gone." Jongin sputtered angrily.  
Kyungsoo sat in place staring and frowning at the man itching his arms and torso. He freaked out when Jongin started to moan and beg again for help. Kyungsoo wrapped him in a towel and brought him back to bed. His heart was being shattered into pieces hearing Jongin shout and beg for money to buy a drug. As Jongin started to aggressively scratch his skin Kyungsoo had to tie him to the bed, to make sure he won't hurt himself. He went out and closed the door. The sound of his moans and screams were heart-wrecking. He begged and screamed for help. Kyungsoo hated himself for having to do this. He dedicated time to search for solutions for the problem in hand.

In no time, a doctor showed up at Kyungsoo's apartment. Jongin wanted to be treated at home. This way he can be under Kyungsoo's watch and properly taken care of. Kyungsoo agreed, but only for a couple of days until he had gotten ready for treatment.

The doctor prescribed Jongin to have an amount of the drug he was addicted to and to minimize the amount every now and then according to the prescription. In addition to psychiatric treatment and a lot of treatments that the doctor was to handle himself. Kyungsoo's mission was to provide care and a suitable environment to help Jongin get over his addiction because the cure was not supposed to be anywhere near easy to Jongin; minimizing the amount of drug would leave Jongin in need and in a continuous struggle for relief. 

Jongin, finally, fell asleep after a long night of torment. The doctor left so the writer rested his tired body on his red fancy sofa and closed his eyes, a couple of breaths... Inhale... Exhale. He didn't know he was lost in a deep slumber until the ringing of his phone woke him up. 

"Hello!"  
"Hey, author Soo," Junmyun's joyful voice ringed in his ears. "You're probably preparing yourself now aren’t you?"  
"For what?"  
"You didn't forget my new years' party tonight, did you?" Junmyun said in a scolding tone. "Where did you go, mister?" he said after seconds of silence.  
"Jongin.. he's here"  
"What??"  
It didn't take long for Junmyun to show up at Kyungsoo's apartment, with his perfectly -styled hair. They stood at the door where Jongin was asleep. "Why did he show up now? And where was he?"  
"His mother passed." Junmyun looked at the writer in shock. It was so sad that the talkative individual stood there silently, face drawn out of color, Kyungsoo has never seen Junmyun this pale.

"When did she pass?" Junmyun asked as they sat on the table in the kitchen.  
"I still don't know anything. I had to take care of him since last night, he was a mess when he showed up at my door last night. He had a fever and he is still an addict." Junmyun noticed that Kyungsoo was struggling to form words and his throat was closing. "I got him a doctor to take care of him_ Jongin didn't sleep at all last night and _and, I_ " Tears betrayed him and fell heavily. "I had no idea what to do with him_ He suffered all night and my heart got shattered because of him."

“You should be relieved now_ He's lucky he's alive and under your care_ most addicts are found dead in dark, bad alleys." He hugged Kyungsoo and felt the approving nod of the other.

"I'm sorry to have rubbed the news in your face while you have an important event tonight. Tell Sehun I couldn't come, and I'll make it up for you guys."

"Don't say that. He will definitely understand. Expect us to come and visit tomorrow night, okay?"  
"Okay.”  
After Junmyun had left, Kyungsoo headed to where Jongin's clothes were discarded. He thought they needed a wash, so he looked in the pockets to empty them before they go into the washing machine, to be surprised that Baekhyun's keys were there.  
"opps" Jongin laughed from behind. Kyungsoo turned quickly. "I should have discarded them earlier, shouldn't I?_ but how can I discard something that belonged to me. They were mine, right?_ and I just retrieved them"

Where did you get these from, Jongin?"

"I came in to your house and took it. Baekhyun doesn't need them any more_ I'm here now." Kyungsoo stood there in shock and disbelief of what he had just heard "but wasn't it tasty?_ that rice cake! not too sweet, that's how you liked it. It's from the café shop where we met for the second time_ where we exchanged numbers_ where Baekhyun works."

"you have put something in it!_ what's going on with you? I can charge you for breaking and entering, let alone your drug issue, you junky"

"oh, I would love to see you try_ anyways, yeah I've put something in it. Baekhyun was always around, and I had to see up-close._ I just missed you_ so fucking much" 

"then why did you leave? Why didn't we get over the death of your mother together?"

" I've always knew that she meant nothing to me. You know how much I disliked her. I just feel sad that she was my mother, she never treated me like her son_ like she had never wanted me_ a mother would protect her children, she would teach them about life, and as they say, she would stay up taking care of you if you ever got sick. My mother was the contrary. She made my life harder. I had to learn everything myself. I had to join myself back to the world after the isolation she put me in. I have no idea how did my father tolerate her all these years" he let out a sad chuckle "they fought a lot, damn it. He was a good man."

"Jongin!" Kyungsoo went to hug Jongin after he saw tears that started to form in his eyes. "you need to let this go_ all these feelings of hate and agony must go away and never come back, they are a burden and too heavy to carry_ I'm here with you now. We can get over it together. We can pick up from where we stopped and carry on with life. I will give you all the love you deserve. I love you, Jongin and I know you love me too, you psycho"

Jongin was silent most of the breakfast time. Kyungsoo thought that Jongin was still in mourn, and that his grief and sadness were taking over him, especially that he still hasn't taken his prescribed dose yet. 

After they both finished, Jongin started to get irritated. The doctor arrived in time and gave him his dose. The cure was not easy because of reducing the usual dose. The doctor's role was important at that time, and his presence was necessary more than ever.

"I want more,"  
"Mr. Kim should now start with the psychological treatment, and I advise him to visit our center to stay for a while, in order to be under our watch twenty-four/seven,"  
"you are not getting any more, Jongin. You need to get better_ that's what you need," Kyungsoo said in a strict tone. "I well get him ready to be there soon, thank you, doctor " Kyungsoo walked the doctor out, and went back to Jongin. "tomorrow is the first day of the new year, you can consider quitting drugs as your new year's goal, babe"  
"we don't have to think that long ahead. We can think of tonight, for instance. We can like_ have fun," Jongin was saying something exciting at last, and Kyungsoo wished to erase that sad expression out of his face because the hot thing he was saying didn't match well with his sad face.

-October 8th 2018

If Jongin was with him, it would never be considered a misfortune. His car got broken on their way home from celebrating their first anniversary together, near the Han river, hours past midnight. It disturbed Kyungsoo, but no sign of dislike of the situation was apparent on Jongin. He just smirked at Kyungsoo, in a blink of an eye Kyungsoo found himself being dragged outside of his car. Jongin let go of his hand and enthusiastically ran towards the bank of the river, and Kyungsoo ran after him.

"let's wait here till sunrise," Jongin said as the glow of the river reflected itself on his eyes. "spread," he asked, and replaced his back o Kyungsoo's abdomen and head on kyungsoo's chest who in return wrapped his arms around the other's torso.  
"I'm happy"  
"Me too_ that's why we should be home right now_ you and I. Let's call someone to come get us or fix the car" Kyungsoo said in haste.  
" no, silly" Jongin laughed. "Let's enjoy this_ we've never visited the Han together, so why not appreciate that the car was broken" Kyungsoo looked in admiration at Jongin for the way he considered the situation. "But we can still have fun here the same way we were to have it at home, maybe more" Jongin smirked at Kyungsoo and positioned himself on kyungsoo's lap.  
"Stop it, someone might pass by and see us;" Kyungsoo pushed him away.  
"I don't mind someone passing by and see my ass," Jongin ruffled his hair in disappointment. "We will remember this, you know!" He tried to approach the other again, only this time he went for the lips and softly kissed him. Jongin attempted to caress kyungsoo's neck, and Kyungsoo did the same. The kiss started to get hotter, and it seemed like Jongin had won, like he always did. Kyungsoo let him win. He let him have the memory he wished to have. Jongin didn't let it be just kissing. He reached his hand to caress his lover's crotch. Fingers worked together to undo the zipper then sneaked into the pants to stroke from above the under garment.

"you're crazy," Kyungsoo chuckled.  
"I''m just being my self," Jongin proudly replied.

-December 31st 2019  
"I never understood what happened that made dislike your mother" said Kyungsoo as he was sitting on his red fancy sofa with Jongin sitting on the floor and his head relaxing on kyungsoo's leg.  
"I'll not go through this with anyone!."  
"oh, yes you will," Kyungsoo gently caressed Jongin's hair. "and_ am I 'anyone' to you, Jongin?"  
"you are everyone I care for, hyung," he exhales ""we just had different visions of how life should be. I didn't like the quality of life that we had, so I blamed it on her.  
" Is that a reason, Jongin. this is a cruel judgment against someone who had no choice"  
"you have no idea, hyung. I felt pity for her. I felt pity for myself _ you have no idea how lonely, stupid and ignorant I was. My mind was at haze. I needed someone. I needed guidance."  
"you're doing great now, babe. You are cleaning your system. You are starting a new life, and I want you to know that I'm here with you. You can be a burden to me as much as you want" Jongin hit his hyung gently on the knee and they laughed, then cried together. Kyungsoo thought that Jongin was still at mourn for his lost. He slept in the arms of what he called safety.  
-January 1st 2020  
Kyungsoo woke up to empty arms. Sun had risen. The first daylight of the new year. He roamed around the apartment looking for Jongin. His efforts weren’t rewarded with finding Jongin because he wasn't there. Kyungsoo freaked out.

"hey!" Junmyun answered with a sleepy voice.  
" Junmyun, he's gone! I don’t know where he is. I just woke up and he wasn't there!"  
"oh, my God. I'll be right there. Did you try to call him?" Junmyun jumped out of his bed.  
"he doesn't have a cell phone. Come here at once,"  
Junmyun and Kyungsoo searched everywhere in the neighborhood. Every alley and every shop. They went back to kyungsoo's place where the two agreed to meet after they finish searching.  
"should we call the police now?" Junmyun suggested after an hour of searching.  
"I think we should" said Kyungsoo who was sitting on his sofa grabbing his head. Staring at Junmyun with teary eyes. Junmyun took his phone out, but before he dialed the number they heard the lock of the door being open.  
"Morning babe! Oh Junmyun's here!" Jongin dropped the keys on the key holder "what happened? why you two so gloomy? "  
Kyungsoo walked towards Jongin and took him In a long hug.  
"where have you been? You got us so worried about you, you know that?" Junmyun declared.  
Jongin's jaw dropped "I_ I left a note. It's on the fridge." He flinched as he took a hit on his chest from Kyungsoo.  
"it's a relief to have you back. The worst of scenarios had crossed our minds"  
"it took you this long to buy cup cakes?" Kyungsoo went out of the kitchen holding the blue note. "Where are those cup cakes by the way?"  
"I didn't buy them! I encountered Taemin at the bakery shop. So we had coffee together because it's been so long since I've seen him,"  
" anyways, guys. I'm glad you two are ok. I'm going back to sleep in the arms of my FIANCÉ" he uttered the last word a tad pit louder and flashed the ring as he glanced at Kyungsoo.  
Jongin giggled and went towards Junmyun to check on the ring. Kyungsoo showed his beautiful heart-shaped smile and expressed how happy he was for Junmyun and Sehun.

-January 2nd 2020

"wherdcha gawing?" Jongin asked as he took a bite of an apple.  
"don't talk with a full mouth, you would choke,"  
"I'm an expert at choking," he smirked and swallowed. "where are you going?"  
"I'm meeting with Baekhyun. I own him an apology and an explanation."  
"tell him I said hi," the man who was putting his coat on gave Jongin the look of disappointment. "WHAT!!" he giggled.  
"aren't you so full of yourself!" Kyungsoo said. "i'm just being my self;" Jongin replied. "Baekhyun has been exceptionally considerate. The least I can do is to apologize. I can't break his heart anymore." He finished putting his clothes on. "and you, young-man. Take a shower and prepare your stuff. We're scheduled to visit the hospital today. Your long journey to heal is to start immediately,"

"yes, mommy" Jongin said mockingly.  
Kyungsoo kissed his lover's forehead and proceeded to leave. Jongin got up in lightening speed to check kyungsoo's departure from behind the curtain of a window. Once he made sure the other had left, he put on some clothes quickly, left a note exactly where he had left it last time, grabbed his keys and got out of the house aiming the opposite building. The elevator got him to his targeted floor. Jongin used one of the keys to enter an apartment that was two floors above kyungsoo's apartment level. It had a full view of the writer's living room. Jongin went to the bedroom that had the pictures of Kyungsoo and everyone he knew, splattered over its walls, and a person nicely dressed sitting on the edge of the bed playing some sort of a game on his phone.  
"you better not be late, he's waiting for you," Jongin uttered nonchalantly. "He wants to apologize or something,"  
"I'm on my way, let me just finish this," the person said with the excitement of the game tinting his sound. "how do I look?" he said laughingly without removing his sight from his phone.  
"miserably cute,"  
"yeah, I'm going to meet the man who is leaving me for his ex," he faked a sad face, and put his phone in his pocket then headed towards Jongin. "do you have them?"  
"yeah I have them here" he dabbed on the bag he was carrying. " kiss him goodbye for me, ok?" Jongin fixed the other's collar.  
"you know I would love to." He laughed.  
"fuck you, Baek,"  
Baekhyun leaves, and Jongin removed every picture on the wall and everything that had to do with Kyungsoo from the apartment in preparation to evacuate it. He took a look at kyungsoo's living room, and the red fancy sofa, clearly visible to his apartment, before he left closing the door behind him..  
"I'm sorry, love_ I'm leaving the same way I left last time. I only hope you won’t be as miserable. Your love marks are all over my body just like last time, only I won't be back to retrieve them_ I'll miss you dearly.."


End file.
